train of thought after trial results...(more to come later)

haven't blogged for a week to experiment if i can voluntarily not blog.

also, it was due to depression, not serious depression, but my marks were super duper bad. i've bombed out in all my trials, including chem from last year...

for jap, i have the power to determine everyone's marks, and thus my mark. go figure.

in english last week, my teacher said do you want to continue doing past papers, or do you want 2 periods to cry?

i cried.

jks.

i just have to work harder. really, really, really disappointed with English since i put so much time and effort into it and didn't pay off. like i was confident with A which turned out the worse, and i totes new i screwed up in B because i made up half my essay, except that turned out the best (which was still not very good). i guess they can tell the difference between a prepared essay and not prepared since for B they were like it was good it wasn't a "set piece" i'm surprised making stuff up for once worked out. i'm just really ))))))))): because my rank is going to drop downnnnn...tbh, so far i've managed to scrape and get A's for everything.

but triallllllllllllllllllllllllls was the first time getting ever so many B's ))):

and know i have never achieved full marks for any English Advanced things (except for listening task, but half the grade got 5/5 so that doesn't count)

post more later. 

so much has happened. on the weekend, the only time i spent at home was to sleep.

i am sososososososo busy. all those applications...just for med! even before results come out are a million things to do. i'm thinking, well i'm not even going to get into unsw, so why bother even wasting time on it, but then i might regret later in life if i didn't try. i guess i would rather try and be unsuccessful than not try at all....

busybusybusybusy

haven't touched maths in so long.